I feel like I’m 16 again.

Dear Bee,

This isn’t real life, okay? I must be in some kind of insane daze. So, I’ve known this guy for literally four days, and it’s felt like I’ve known him for a ten years. We talk effortlessly. I am so intrigued. He is so intrigued. I’ve never experienced something this intense so fast.

Last week, I was moaning about my ex-boyfriend moving on. Last week, I was bitching about my married coworker and our weird office flirtation.

And then this guy came out of nowhere.

Literally and utterly nowhere.

And he’s essentially the male version of me. It’s almost creepy. Almost.

Like, he’s also in training to be a therapist. Exact same program as me. Different school. We started at the same time. We speak the same therapeutic language. It’s beautiful. We had an hour-long conversation about the DSM. Who does that? Meaning not only can he talk about thoughts and feelings, he WANTS to talk about them.

Like, he works at the exact same place of employment I did a year ago. As in, we totally just discovered we have mutual friends. 

Like, he enjoys hiking and yoga and “being one with nature.” The hippie in me is swooning.

Like, he has the exact same family structure as mine. His brother is three years younger than him, just as mine is. 

Like, we had the same major in college. Psychology. Oh, and he also majored in philosophy, for good measure. 

LIke, he is also a beach bum. YES.

LIke, he also has a black belt in martial arts. We can both kick each other’s asses!

Like, we share the same religion (even though neither of us are religious).

Like, we can talk for hours about philosophy, existentialism, the downfall of capitalism, and all the other exciting topics that few people can even understand much less enjoy.

Like, he’s CUTE. SUPER CUTE. 

Like, he has a puppy. That he walks and takes care of faithfully!

Like, he’s genuinely INTERESTED in all my ramblings, musings, and quirks.

 

 

This is so absolutely irrational. My head is screaming at me to slow down. But, screw it, man. I never give my heart a chance, and this time I’m giving my heart all the attention. Not letting fear in. Not letting doubt in. Just following the intuition; listening to what feels right. It feels so good to feel. To feel butterflies. To feel excited. To feel happy!! Emotions don’t come in pretty, predictable packages, and these moments don’t just happen without a reason. So, I’ll just ride this wave of bliss and let it carry me wherever it needs to go. 

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